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Gavriloaiei Sabina

Imi place sa vorbesc si sa ascult, imi place sa rad, imi place sa fiu inconjurata de oameni de calitate. Mu imi place sa fac lucruri care nu ma reprez...

Blogs Home » Personal » Personale » Fake it 'till you become it

Fake it 'till you become it

Mi-am deschis bloggul din curiozitate... apoi a devenit o pasiune... si apoi un obicei.

Articole Blog

01. Why every recruitment process needs time? - Oct 18, 2019 6:09:00 PM

I am a recruiter and many candidates use to tell me ”instead of having a meeting, it would be easier to send me some JDs and I will decide if there is something which interests me”. I totally agree that everyone's time is very important. If you are ok with your job, you don't want to spend time in other recruitment processes. You feel that it is a waste of time to have an HR interview, then some technical tests or interviews, some meetings with the team or with the manager, or to see the office.But when you involve in some recruitment processes, there is a chance to find what new projects there are in the market and what are the newest technical requirements. Yes... being informed also needs time!
If you don't like to treated as one between many other specialists in the market, why do you treat a job or a company like one in many others?I use to say that nowadays recruitment processes there are some win-win processes. Both (the employee and the employer) can choose and both of them invest time.So, why every recruitment process needs time and more steps for you, as a candidate? Because in this way you will know if you fit with the company or with the team, if you would like your manager or if the project will allow you to grow.There is an experiment in Psychology that sais that we appreciate more the things for whom we work harder. It's not important if you work on IT or sales, if you are an HR or an engineer. If you don't take time to involve in a recruitment process, most probably you don't care about this choice. If you don't care about this choice, you are not allowed to complain about the job. That is the reason why some people are happy with their jobs and some aren't. And that is the reason why some specialists just choose a job and others choose a career.
In the end, I will propose an exercise – it is not important in what domain you work or what seniority you have. Think at the most wanted company in the market – that company where you really appreciate for their product, or for their specialist or clients. What makes you so special and it will convince them to hire you?When you will have the answer to this question, for sure you will treat with the maximum seriosity that recruitment process!

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02. Self-Handicapping at Work - Oct 13, 2019 5:43:00 PM

Self-handicapping involves engaging in behaviors that sabotage your chances of success. Although we all want to feel good, sometimes we preffer to avoid taking responsibilities for our activity. The phenomenon was first described by researchers Stephen Berglas and Edward Jones in 1978.Do you remember when you were a student and you had to prepare for an exam? Do you remember that sometimes that was the most proper moment to start.... cleaning your room, instead of studying? Then, of course, it was the other¢s fault for your poor result J.When you find an outside source to blame for possible failures, it can be an effective strategy for protecting your self-esteem. But this has a significantly negative impact on success. It can lead to lower motivation and less incentive to try to succeed in the future.
To avoid this at work, ask yourself: “How am I growing professionally right now?” If you feel that is complicated to answer on this, then you can try to identify these behaviors:Avoiding AccountabilityLacking Self-AwarenessHaving Tunnel VisionLacking EngagementPoor Analysis and Decision MakingPoor CommunicationPoor Talent DevelopmentMicromanagingNot Driving for Results
This list is made by Phillip Decker and Jordan Mitchell. The good news is that inside the book Self-Handicapping Leadership , they guide on how to overcome them.

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03. Are we right? - Sep 28, 2019 5:41:00 AM

04. Even if you took 10 at the exam... - Sep 14, 2019 4:25:00 PM

05. How to negotiate for a higher success - Aug 31, 2019 7:32:00 AM

06. Corporate Stockholm Syndrome - Aug 17, 2019 5:21:00 AM

Stockholm Syndrome refers to the psychological phenomenon observed in hostage situations where the hostages start to identify and sympathize with their captor. The captor controls the life source of the captive; also the punishment and the reward.Because work has a great impact in our lives, we are at risk for experiencing Corporate Stockholm Syndrome – a thing that happens when employees begin to identify with an employer who mistreats them (like bullying behaviors or just ignoring the emotional needs of the employee).Of course, there is a difference between being held captive in the workplace and being held captive in a real-life hostage scenario, but the employee experiencing Corporate Stockholm Syndrome displays a tendency to become emotionally attached to the company to the detriment of their emotional health. The employee will also rationalize the poor treatment as necessary for the good of the organization as a whole, and he will defend the employer’s actions.
Do you think that this is not possible? You didn’t have any friend who was complaining (several times) about his work and you asked him why he doesn’t change the job? And his answer was that is not so bad or he will not find something better than this. Well... this is a good start for this.Breaking the cycle is hard, but choosing to do nothing and hoping to outlast it is a frequent option. Very similar to other negative phenomena that can happen into the organizations, for an employee it is important to be aware of his state, to name it and to ask for help. We can feel that is not fair to leave a job or a team – it is not fair for them. On the other side, if we stay in that environment and we feel bad, it is not fair for us. Can you live with this?

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07. Be welcomed! - Aug 3, 2019 10:06:00 AM

08. How do we choose... our manager? - Jul 26, 2019 6:33:00 PM
We usually talk about how do we choose our job – especially the first one. We hear a lot that we have to assess carefully the job description or the company¢s brand.But we are prepared to choose also our manager?We are not anymore in the moment when only the HR and the hiring manager asks for recommendations. The candidate also can ask for information from the market for the company or the manager.For my point of view, there are some things make a manager a significant one for your career:it lets you to make mistakes and it helps you to learn from themit anticipates your movements / possible difficult situationsit is aware of your needs and it does steps to reach themit takes some risks with youit knows your potentialit sustains your development needsit is not afraid that you will grow too much
In the end, a classic speech on leadership.

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09. The power of a second place - Jul 20, 2019 5:47:00 AM

10. How should I work as HR? - Jul 13, 2019 1:13:00 PM

Being an HR is not like a job for whom you dream or prepare since you were a kid. I don¢t know any child who says ”when I will group I want to be an HR” and maybe there are still some parents of us who use to say ”Personnel department” instead of ”HR department”.So let's start with the beginning.How do you prepare for an HR career? You can graduate a faculty, you can take some training on this or you can take training on the job.In Iasi, there are 3 faculties where you can study for HR – Psychology, Economics, and Philosophy. Each of them has its advantages and expertise in some area.As training, you cand take a general one as HR manager or some particular ones – on the activity you will do (like recruitment, training, admin).The training on the job works better for somebody who knows already the activity from the company and it just changes the department.

What does HR? You can work as an HR in a company or in consultancy.(Some of) The domains where you can work are:RecruitmentCompensations and benefitsTraining and organizational developmentPerformance managementPersonnel managementPayrollInternal communicationEmployer brandingReportingHR Management

Being an HR is not an easy or a difficult job. But behind the technical skills you need, maybe the most difficult part of this role are the soft skills – things regarding work ethics, social interactions, and data-driven decisions.Some referrals to understand better the basics of HR: 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 or 5

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11. What about Bullying? - Jul 6, 2019 7:58:00 AM

Do you have any colleague who use to tease you or sabotage you? Well... this is a ”good” start for bullying.Behind every bullying behavior, we can see a lot of implications for an employee: a stressful environment, a decline of performance or commitment to the organization, a decrease of work effort or work quality, maybe quitting the job. Because of this, the costs of workplace bullying are high for both employees and employers.From both sides, there has to be done some things.As an employee, you can:Acknowledge that there is a problem. Have you seen ”the elephant from the room” ? Name it! Bullies can make you feel as it¢s your fault or you just exaggerate. By giving it a name, you can remind yourself that it is a real problem and you are not to blame.Document the behavior. About the future steps you may take, it is important to count all the toxic workplace behaviors. It helps to have specific examples to support your claims. This can serve as a reminder that the abuse is more than just a feeling.Focus on healing and support. Because your health and well-being are the priority, it is important to check the ways in which bullying is affecting your mental and physical health. If you find you are suffering, seek help from specialists.Strategy and actions. Take time to search company policies and a legal framework to support this situation. Based on this, you can plan some actions and you can involve the management team from the company, the HR or the Legal advisor.Follow-up. What happened after your complain? If nothing happened, it is not anymore your responsibility to change something in the company¢s culture. For you, it is important to make decisions that are best for your well-being.
As an employer, you can not be aware of what is happing daily in your teams. To ensure a healthy work environment, you can:Review available internal policies. Examine if your employees know what they have to do when they are the victims of some bullying behaviors. To whom they have to address? Or what measures you have to take when you receive a complaint?Open a dialogue with current employees. Are they satisfied with their work? Are you ok with your turnover rate? Create a safe, open space where employees can discuss their concerns and wants. This can be in the form of anonymous surveys, individual discussions, or both. Be sure to listen to and seriously consider the information your employees share with you.Take action. After reviewing data, policies, and interviews, you may have conflicting or unclear information. You may receive complaints about individuals whom you considered your best employees or find that your mission and values as an organization are not being upheld in practice. Leaders within the organization must discuss these findings and determine what specifically needs to change, whether it is different hiring practices, improved policies for employee conflict, or a stronger adherence to the beliefs of the organization.
It is not is easy to confront bullying because is meant to address any toxic behaviors that had been allowed or even encouraged up until that point. While this could require large changes, creating a healthy workplace culture and having policies in place to support all employees is a smart business decision. This investment on the front end can save losses in turnover, work productivity, and even lives.

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12. About a national culture - Jun 29, 2019 9:46:00 AM

When I was a student, I found about an author who proposed a theory with 6 cultural dimensions which can be assessed for each country. Geert Hofstede is the author's name and his model describes a society based on the values of its members.Based on a lot of research on this area, the theory grew and the nowadays model is as it follows:Power distance - the extent to which the less powerful members of organizations and institutions accept and expect that power is distributed unequally. A higher degree of this indicates that hierarchy is clearly established and executed in society. A lower degree of this index signifies that people question authority and attempt to distribute power.Individualism vs. Collectivism - the degree to which people in a society are integrated into groups. Individualistic societies have loose ties that often only relate an individual to his/her immediate family. They emphasize the “I” versus the “we.” The collectivism describes a society in which tightly-integrated relationships tie extended families and others into in-groups.Uncertainty avoidance - a society's tolerance for ambiguity, in which people embrace or avert an event of something unexpected, unknown, or away from the status quo. Societies that score a high degree in this index opt for stiff codes of behavior, guidelines, laws, and generally rely on absolute truth, or the belief that one lone truth dictates everything and people know what it is. A lower degree in this index shows more acceptance of differing thoughts or ideas.Masculinity vs. Femininity - masculinity is defined as a preference in society for achievement, heroism, assertiveness and material rewards for success. Its counterpart represents a preference for cooperation, modesty, caring for the weak and quality of life. In feminine societies, they share modest and caring views equally with men. In more masculine societies, women are somewhat assertive and competitive, but notably less than men.Long-term orientation vs. short-term orientation - the connection of the past with the current and future actions/challenges. A lower degree of this index (short-term) indicates that traditions are honored and kept, while steadfastness is valued. Societies with a high degree in this index (long-term) view adaptation and circumstantial, pragmatic problem-solving as a necessity.Indulgence vs. restraint - the degree of freedom that societal norms give to citizens in fulfilling their human desires. Indulgence is defined as a society that allows relatively free gratification of basic and natural human desires related to enjoying life and having fun. Its counterpart is defined as a society that controls the gratification of needs and regulates it by means of strict social norms.
Curious about how is Romania accordingly to Hofstede's model?You can search on its website
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13. I will be able to do it? - Jun 22, 2019 5:47:00 AM
Do you remember a very difficult moment, when there was a lot of pressure on you and you had the feeling that you can’t do more than this?We’ve been there. But there are some peoples that reshape themselves easier than the others (for eg., the sportsmen). One of the things that are different at them is resilience.That is the process of adapting well in the face of trauma, tragedy or significant sources of stress. It is crucial to high performance and it is a thing that doesn't happen by chance.When you're under pressure making the right choice is difficult. It requires your ability to identify the best course of action given your knowledge, understanding of the situation, past experience, and awareness of available resources.In most of the situations, we want to be resilient.If you’re not, you can build our resilience, like this:Think about what changes can appear and look for the benefits of them. Although it is a difficult moment and things weren’t how we did expect, the change is part of our life and it is easier to focus on the good things that came with the changeFind people who you can count on – you can easier face a difficult moment if you have the support of somebody close to you, somebody who can help you and somebody who won't criticize you.Focus on the future, not in the past. It is ok to analyze that stressful moment you have. It helps you to understand where you wrong in the past and what behaviors you have change for the future. To boost your resilience don’t stay locked in your past because you can’t change it.Re-analyze your goals – are them real ones? You are still available or interested to achieve them?Once you agreed with your goals, analyze what steps you have to do... and do them. A self-discipline of getting things done right helps you to avoid some difficult moment. Also, it helps you to see things in perspective.
I think that everybody has resilience. It’s just a matter of how much and how well you use it in your life.

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14. Lessons learned from Brene Brown - Jun 8, 2019 4:00:00 PM

Open yourself up only to those people who have earned the right to hear your story.Be the adult you want your children to be.What other people think of you is none of your business.Nostalgia is a dangerous form of comparison.We judge others because we judge ourselves.You might have 1 million friends on facebook but that doesn’t mean that those people are really your friend.Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning and purpose to our lives.
*Dr. Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work.She has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy and is the author of five #1 New York Times bestsellers: The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, Braving the Wilderness, and her latest book, Dare to Lead, which is the culmination of a seven-year study on courage and leadership.Brené’s TED talk – The Power of Vulnerability – is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world with over 35 million views. She is also the first researcher to have a filmed talk on Netflix. The Call to Courage special debuted on the streaming service on April 19, 2019.

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15. What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up? - Jun 1, 2019 5:43:00 PM
Today is 1st June and we celebrate Children's Day. Because of this, I remember a question that followed me the entire childhood: ”What do you want to be when you grow up?”Thinking at this question, I made a list with some jobs I think that are popular with all-times children:Teacher. Many children consider their first teacher as an example for them. They enjoy to interact with other children, so they consider this job similar to playing games with other children.Police Officer. Children (especially boys) dream of becoming police officers because they fight against bad people and help citizens. They are impressed by their uniforms and all the accessories they were.Doctor or Veterinarian. Children want to help other people or to treat animals. If their interactions with the pediactricians are good, they will see this job as an easy and a nice one.Dancer or Musician. Many kids dream of being artists – performing on the stage, being popular and being validated by fans. For this, many parents sustain their children with ballet or piano classes.Athlete. Many children like sports. They have energy, enthusiasm and courage. They like competition, but also working with a team.
When you are on the other side – of a person who doesn't know what to do – you can do some simple steps: make a list of 5-10 jobs you know and organize the list (choosing the favorite ones)talk to a counselor and take some career tests (to assess with what you fit with)do some research and learn about the job – volunteering work and internships can be some options.
If you were a child, what job would you like to do?

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16. Do we need data? - May 25, 2019 5:29:00 AM

17. What about your salary expectations? - May 17, 2019 6:35:00 PM

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18. Workplace loneliness - May 10, 2019 3:01:00 PM
Encourage work-life integration (not balance)Encourage the contribution of each member of the teamOrganize networking events with the team with a certain periodicityOrganize an effective onboarding processShow appreciation in a way that is relevant for the employeeAsk each employee with a certain periodicity of how he/she feelsBeside what companies do, we can take some initiatives to know well our colleagues. For this, we can try to open discussions with some colleagues we don’t know so well, but we are really interest to know them better. On this way, we can find people with similar values or similar hobbies. We can realise that we are neighbours with some of our colleagues and it might help us to make new friends.In the end, I don't think that it is important how many colleagues you have. It matters how well you know them.

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19. How do we use social media? - May 4, 2019 5:32:00 AM

I read some article on some blogs (1, 2)  with some statistics on how Romanian people use social media. Taking into account that this is a habit on the top 3 things people are doing in the morning (besides breakfast and reading email), I think we can take a look on results to be aware of how we can use them in nowadays activity:
Facebook was and it is still on the top of the preferences (94% of the people from the survey have a FB account; the next one is Youtube with 63%)Instagram grew a lot (between December 2017 and December 2018 the total users' number was doubled)Linkedin is not anymore on the top 3 of the preferences, but it is still one of the most accessedPinterest it is one of the web sites that we access more than we did the previous year (or maybe just for 40% of the people)Even if we have the perception that Twitter is not very popular, it is constant in the middle of the ranking (between December 2017 and December 2018 the users' number and tweets number maintain in similar parameters)

In my work, ”consumers” expectations are important for the way we communicate with them and for the channel we use to do it. Although we are aware of the differences between generations and the purpose of our communication, Facebook, Youtube, and Instagram are on the top, followed by Linkedin and Pinterest.We use Facebook for all kind of businesses / for general consumers in order to gain visibility and engage with new and existing customers. We use YouTube for B2B and B2C businesses for general consumers seeking entertainment because we can share for them all kind of videos. We use Instagram for B2C businesses, but the audience is mainly formed by urban and suburban millennials for whom we can share photographs and video-stories. LinkedIn is used by professionals in any industry (and I want to emphasize ”professionals”), especially those interested in targeting or hiring educated specialists. We use Pinterest for brands marketing, a platform from whom we can save and organize images that link to products, articles or other content.It is a fact that recruiters look at a candidate’s social profiles. But also the candidates can search the recruiters on social media. If it is public, this is legal. Because of this, we can we more cautious to share private information and to differentiate a personal account by a professional account

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20. How do we learn? - Apr 20, 2019 6:28:00 AM

21. Do we still need a business dress code? - Apr 13, 2019 6:01:00 AM
Some of us heard at least once ”Be attention how you will dress for your next interview. You have to look professional”.We are not anymore the generation who likes suits, but during any business meeting, you have to dress properly.The right attitude, combined with the right attire, can help you to set-up a proper collaborative environment with any type of client.Every industry has its rules and every company has its dress-code. But what I've learned is that if you want to be safe with your attire you have to follow some rules:Don't exaggerate: after a meeting, you want to be remembered for the things you said, not for the overwhelming dress or accessories you were.When in doubt, follow the guidelines of standard business attire. A skirt or some pants with a shirt or a blouse never killed anybody. And it fits with most of the body shapes.Just a little bit of color: I am a big fan of cyclam or blue electric shoes. But I use to wear these colors only on shoes not only on the entire dress.Just a little bit of print: animal print, bullets or stripes can be used only as an accent of the attire; just one of them and being attention how we combine it with the colorSkirts and dresses – choose them being attention for the color, the material, but more than this for the length. When you sit in a chair, you can asses if the skirt exposure too much of your legs. For your comfort, if you were a slit, try it centered and in the back.Shirts and blouses: it has to follow the body line and to be in line with the rest of your outfit. Avoid those clothes that show your shoulders, which are transparent or they show part of your bra.Shoes have to be nice and comfortable. Flat-shoes or stillettos don't feet well with a business outfit.
I admit that most of us want to dress up with something beautiful for them, not for the others. But while people have the right to express themselves, so businesses have a similar right. The way we dress definitely sends intended or unintended messages to the clients or to the customers. We need to remember every time that first impressions are important, and we only get one chance to make a positive first impression.
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22. Criticism ... or just feedback - Apr 6, 2019 6:28:00 PM
We don’t like being criticized. We don’t like it because this means that we have some weak points and we have to work on them.To take the best from this criticism, we can asses:how relevant are people who did itwhat critics repeat themselveswhat importance have these subjects into our life
If we switch the perspective, we take the criticisms as feedback. The differences are on intention (criticism is like a judge, while feedback is more as a corrective message).To give proper feedback, you have to:choose a comfortable moment for feedbackbe specificfocus on behaviors, not on personalitydeliver the feedback very close in time to the behaviorfacilitate a relevant feed-forward
Feedback is not only about the one-to-one relationship because companies also can receive feedback from their employees. For this, there is the habit of an employee engagement survey. To have an impact from this process, it has to be done with some periodicity and to take some decisions based on the results.
In the end, I think that giving feedback represents a moment of trust. If it is made with care, it can contribute to a stronger and reliable relationship.

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23. Be creative. The rest can wait - Mar 30, 2019 11:49:00 AM

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24. This is about what people know about you - Mar 23, 2019 5:16:00 AM
In a market where each employer is looking for talents, each employee is looking for the best opportunity he has on the market.In this context, each specialist has to asses his professional value. He has to be aware of what other specialists he associates with and what things he promotes.Let’s make an exercise: google your name.What does it appear?There is a good image of you or not?The are some professional information about you or just private ones?Is it relevant for you as a specialist?What other information is relevant about you and it is not on Google?This is a part of your personal brand.

In many companies, the manager / the CEO is the most powerful image for that brand.But that is also true that when a candidate chooses a certain company he takes the decision based on information he receives from the other people (HR, hiring manager or his peers from the company). Because of this, each employee, with his personal brand, contributes to the company’s brand.There is a circle: some good employees attract good candidates or clients for the company and a good company attracts good candidates.Let’s make another exercise: in your area, what specialists do you appreciate the most?For what companies they work?What makes them so special as professionals?What do you have to do to be as good as they are?
As I already said, the employees’ brand is in a direct relationship with the employer’s brand. They have to sustain each other and to complete each other.

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25. Taking care of how we organize remote working - Mar 16, 2019 7:30:00 AM
I’ve mentioned several times that I am a big fan of work-life balance.The scientific literature mentions remote working as a thing that facilitates work-life balance. I do sustain the fact that this measure is hard to put it in place in a productive manner.There are some things that need to be done by employees to assure the efficiency of remote working:Follow the same vision and the same values. Working in the same office, it helps the team to understand some smooth ”whys” (to read them as ”reasons” or ”directions”) of the work.Share the information. There are some domains where teamwork is necessary. Also, there are some moments when it is easier to come closer to your colleague and to discuss a certain problem. You can do it also by Skype or by phone if you feel comfortable with it. But not all of us do it.Engagement with the team: it is hard to have a close relationship with someone you don’t see it. The virtual team is not the same as the physical one.Infrastructure: to work on the same tools or documents with the people from the office. You have to be sure that you can access them whenever you are.External distractors: if you work from home, you have to be sure that your family’s expectations are not to be available especially for them. During your working hours, you have to be available most of the time for business issues. For this, you have to practice self-discipline to work as well as you were in the office.Health and safety measure: whose fault is when are happening some home accidents? Employees or employers? Working from home, you can’t assure the same safety conditions as if you work from the office.
Of course, there are also some advantages to remote working. You have to have some mature employees and to trust them that they will offer the same quality as office working. We have to remember as well that you can reduce costs and you use your personal time more efficient.
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